* The Chemically Enhanced Comedy of Brian Lee *
next show:   to be announced...soon!
{
}
Cerebral                           
Punishment
         Reasons to Drink for January:

1 1943 - Happy Birthday Don Novello (Father Guido Sarducci).
2 1967 - Happy Birthday Tia Carrere.
3 1970 - Davy Jones announced he was leaving The Monkees.  
4 1999 - Former professional wrestler Jesse Ventura was sworn in as
Minnesota's 37th governor.
5 1998 - Sony Bono died in a skiing accident.   See, even SEMI-famous
people shouldn't ski.
6 1987 - Elton John cancelled all live performances for a year after
having throat surgery.   Insert your own "stuck in throat" joke here.
7 1948 - Happy Birthday to Rock & Roll bad boy, Kenny Loggins.
8 1973 - Elvis Presley sued Priscilla Presley for a divorce.
9 1944 - Happy Birthday Jimmy Page.
10 1949 - Vinyl records were introduced by RCA and Columbia.
11 1967 - Jimi Hendrix recorded "Purple Haze."
12 1971 - "All In the Family" debuted on CBS-TV.
13 1979 - The Y.M.C.A. filed a lawsuit against the Village People over
their song, "Y.M.C.A."
14 1966 - David Jones changed his last name to Bowie to avoid
confusion with Davy Jones from the Monkees.   Holy shit...Davy Jones
has gotten TWO mentions already....he's on the comeback!!
15 1948 - Ronnie Van Zant would have been 64 years old today.
16 1976 - The album, "Frampton Comes Alive", was released.
17 1949 - Comedian Andy Kaufman would have turned 63 today.
18 1974 - Bad Company was formed.
19 1951 - Happy Birthday Martha Davis (The Motels)
20 1969 - Elvis Presley recorded "In the Ghetto" and "Suspicious
Minds."
21 1925 - Comedian Benny Hill would have turned 85 today.
22 1879 - British troops were massacred by the Zulus at Isandhlwana.  
Can the Brits beat ANYONE?
23 1964 - Happy Birthday Mariska Hargitay (Law & Order: SVU)
24 1949 - John Belushi would have turned 60 today.
25 1971 - Charles Manson was found guilty of one count of conspiracy
to commit murder.
26 1934 - The Apollo Theatre opened in New York City.
27 1756 - Composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was born.
28 1978 - The Doobie Brothers made an appearance on ABC-TV's
"What's Happening."   Who doesn't remember that?
29 1970 - Happy Birthday Heather Graham.
30 1900 - The British fighting the Boers in South Africa ask for a larger
army.   I am noticing a trend here.
31 1970 - Happy Birthday Minnie Driver.
Cerebral                           
Punishment
Next show: To Be Announced.
       "Brian-Buster" Recommendations"

Must See:  "Draft Day" (2014).   How can any sports fan pass up the
chance to see Cleavland do anything right...even if it's in a movie.  Come
on, it doesn't happen often.

Must Avoid:  
"Tammy" (2014)".  Not Melissa McCarthy's best work.  
Looks like she is turning out to be a one trick pony.
                                                       Manitoba Moose's
                        Tasteless Jokes of the Month
                  


-  Q: How do you know the Ravens had a 10-6 record this year?
A: 10 arrests and 6 convictions.

-  Q: What is the difference between a Ravens fan and a baby?
A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.

-  Q: How do you stop an Baltimore Ravens fan from beating his wife?
A: Dress her in Black and Gold!

-  Q: If you have a car containing a Ravens wide receiver, a Ravens
linebacker, and a Ravens defensive back, who is driving the car?
 A: The cop.

-  Q: Why do Baltimore Ravens fans keep their season tickets on their
dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

-  Q: How many Ravens fans does it take to change a light bulb?
 A: None they are happy living in Pittsburgh's shadow!
                        
        Annual New Year's Resolutions

Also known as "shit I probably won't end up doing, but it's really fun to
pretend I will list".  

In all honesty, this year is going to see some MAJOR changes.  A lot of
them, some of you are already aware of.  The rest of you (and by you, I
mean the decent folk who are kindly enough to actually read what I
write and not just look at the fucking pictures) will be finding out shortly
what these changes are going to be.

So, here's the short list of possible resolutions:

- More drinking.  I have been slacking in this area for the past couple
years.  I need to get back to where I was about 5 years ago.

- Less stress.  I use this as a piggyback on the first resolution.  
Remember...drinking is better than thinking....which leads to less stress.

- For those of you for REALLY appreciate my humor, whether it be on
this website, on the stage, or in a day-to-day setting, I vow to be even
less "politically correct" than ever before.  Starting February 3rd, the
gloves are off!

So, let me hear from you.  Starting next month, what do you want me to
talk about?  I think I will start an "Ask Brian Anything" column and see
where it goes.

Till next time......drinks are on me,

BL
                   Brian's Bucket List!
              Just a random list of things  Brian wants "to do" before  
              
it's all over.  This month:  Stephanie Finochi!
Counter